When I was a teen I came across an ad in Rolling Stone magazine for a cosmetic line called "Urban Decay". This started my obsession with alternative cosmetics... I mean... who wouldn't want eye shadow in the putrid shades of garbage? But I never actually bought any. I wanted to, but Lack Of Credit Cards probably did me in. In Edmonton, we have a great little cosmetic store called Lux Beauty and it sells my current favorite lip gloss.... Lip Venom. This lip gloss is super-shiny, lasts a really long time, it comes in some great colors, and the most interesting part about it is that when you put it on, it stings. Like, really stings. It's distracting at first, and you want to wipe your mouth off. And it's supposed to plump up your lips. I don't know if it actually does, because I haven't done a time lapse camera shoot of my face, but it's still a really great product.